An Anthropological Look at Usenet

< Webhelp: Usenet

This is part of a discussion from alt.html and is posted here with B.P.'s permission. It has been edited slightly for typographical correctness and the relevant portion reformatted for better readability. Here's the original message: <[email protected]> at Google Groups.

Subject: Re: Hand Coding: The one way trip to an awful looking website...
Date: Mon, 17 Jul 2000 13:08:48 GMT
Newsgroups: alt.html

Rob -
> Someone:
> > Rob -
> > > First off this is Usenet, not a board.
> >
> > Actually, it is to  I am on in the forum.
> >
> No this is Usenet. You may be using a web interface to it, but it is
> Usenet. A 'board' is a different animal.

B.P. replies:


The scientific name is Usenet Sapien, where the Boards species is Yahoo Sapiens.

Usenet Sapiens are characterized as having great intelligence. They can be observed in a variety of environments and are remarkably adaptable. Usenet Sapien's diet typically consist of Trolls and newbies along with a highly caffeinated beverage. Usenet Sapiens are territorial and will protect their territory defiantly particularly when members of the AOL Sapiens and the WebTV Sapiens invade. Usenet Sapiens typically are nocturnal creatures.

Yahoo Sapiens are charactarized by their inferior intelligence. They are slow, clumsy and dimwitted creatures. They are not very adaptable and are rarely seen outside of their limited range of environments. Yahoo Sapien's diet consists of mostly brussel sprouts and other defenseless prey. They are often known to accidently invade the territory of the Usenet Sapien where they are viscously attacked. Being dimwitted, Yahoo Sapiens often make the same errors over and over again.

There are reports of a new species of these animals. It is reported to share characteristics of both the Yahoo Sapiens and Usenet Sapiens. Scientists are currently studying this odd species which they have tentatively named Deja Sapiens[1] as well as the lesser know variety Remarq Sapiens[2]. It is still not known if these new species are the result of cross breeding of the species, or some cyber weapon created by the Yahoo Sapiens in an attempt to invade the Usenet Sapiens territory.

I hope this clears up everything for everybody.

B.P. -[3]

1. was the long lived Usenet archive that has since been acquired by

2. was similar to Deja News -- a web interface to Usenet. The service is no longer available.

3. The iSpelunker domain is not functioning as of 2004-04-14.

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